‘The Golden Girls,’ like you’ve never seen them before

By John Lyle Belden

The Loud and Fast Funny gang is at it again, presenting mature ladies with “mature” content in “The Golden Girls: The Lost Episodes.”

This mostly-drag parody of the old hit TV show was originally written by David Cerda and developed by Hell in a Handbasket Productions of Chicago. LAFF are local actors, presenting this hour-long treat at the cabaret second stage of The District Theatre, managed by IndyFringe.

The mood is set as the audience enters to the sounds of classic television show themes from the 1970s and ‘80s, interspersed with the audio of commercials from the era (remember L’eggs panty hose?), as well as network jingles from NBC, the original TV home of the Girls.

Then, it’s the strains of “Thank You For Being a Friend,” and we meet our small-screen friends: Rose (Jim Banta), Blanche (Pat Mullen), Dorothy (Dave Ruark) and Sophia (Olivia Schaperjohn). They launch into two half-hour episodes, with words and innuendo that the network censors would certainly not allow, joined by Christian Condra as a handsome doctor in the first part, and Jazzercise Jeff in the second. There is no nudity, just a couple of edgy costume choices — but still, don’t take the kids.

While a touch raunchy — like some grandmas get when young’uns aren’t around — the plots are also funny and entertaining, much like if the Girls were a show on HBO. In the first, silly Rose deals with an episode of restless-leg syndrome as she prepares for a big dance contest. In the second, the hot aerobics instructor has a thing for Blanche — and Sophia? — while Dorothy makes an attempt to show her “nice” side.

Between the episodes, a swingin’ Condra comes out to host a game show in which two audience members get a shot at a genuine Golden Girls-themed prize.

A fun Fringe-length show at a Fringe ticket price, performances are Fridays and Saturdays, two shows each night, through April 27. Get info and tickets at indyfringe.org

LAFF Shows also staged the recent production of “Hold On To Your Butts,” and will present another Recent Cutbacks-produced show, “Fly, You Fools” — a parody shot-by-shot re-creation of “Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring” (in one hour) — May 3-25. Get to know the troupe at facebook.com/LAFFshows.

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